Thursday, October 23, 2008

People have TOO much time on thier hands!

So while looking for a clip on youtube of the most infamous "bird is the word" rendition by Peter on Family Guy, I come upon this shit:

Just Say No

"Call me crazy, but I probably would've hit that"
-Sala, in regards to the woman below from Nacho Libre:

His excuse? He has a problem [sex fiend]. ...stay in school, kids.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Thinking past Party Lines...

Former Secretary of State for the Bush Administration, Colin Powell, officially endorsed my boy Barack.

Republican? Democrat? Who cares?! Colin Powell sensed the absolutely obvious corruption back in the day, hence why he gladly turned over his position to Condi (eww). He does/knows what is best for us as a nation, not us as Democrats or us as Republicans.

What I like even more is that he explains his reasoning behind supporting Barack with such decorum and such sensibility. Its magnificent.

Mr. Powell, I salute you.

History in The Making (YES WE CAN!) :

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Men in bad drag never fails.

So "The Hills According to Me" is absolutely hysterical. Obviously, only true The Hills fans would get the humor, but its really funny. When watching it, I legitimately laughed out loud. I was cracking up in my room to the point that my mom had to come in and ask what was wrong.

Please Watch:

Pure comedic genius. There's no way that the actual cast members on The Hills can't laugh at this.

And also, major kudos to the one actor who parody's all the roles. Snaps.

Friday, October 17, 2008

I Need a Picker-Upper

Since life is getting me down right about now, I figured I'd watch the one thing that is almost a certain cure to my sadness: Family Guy.

Some of my fav clips (the first one is for Steph):

Political (of course):

Stewie is a G! -

Yea. If only for momentary relief :-/

Smashin' Fashion.

Corny title, I know. But damn. As a t-shirt fanatic, I'm really happy with the fashion that my boy Barack is inspiring:

Aww. What a cutie pie:


Quieres mas? Click here.


I hate being alone.
I hate being home alone.
I hate being home along with a sore toe.

Damn this only-child bullshit. I wish I had a sibling, or an imaginary friend, or an attention span of a 20 year old and not a 5 year old.

I really like people. I'm pretty much the epitome of a people person. I love having roommates, I love all of my friends. I love having random convos with the people that work at Duane Reade/Staples/Pinkberry/ the local bodega. I love pets, I just love interacting with another presence, whether its verbally or otherwise.

Therefore, this bed-stricken bullshit is TORTURE for me.

I'm waaay too hyper and I get bored waaay too easily for me to be cooped up in this house UNTIL THURSDAY BECAUSE OF THIS TOE!

FML x's 500000000000000000000.

My husband is FINALLY in town this weekend and I can't even play with him in the city because my doctor said I have to stay off my feet until Wednesday :( Lamelamelamelamelame.

Oddly enough, I was in the hospital this time last year... Habit? I hope not.

This BLOWS. ...that's what she said. Ow.

The Conspiracy Continues.

Stephanie will understand the title :)

Never did I ever think Porn and Politics would go in the same sentence....well...maybe not never, but still. Governor Sarah Palin, McCain's interesting and unknown VP pick has inspired a PORNO.

Yep. That's right. Sarah fucking Palin, the pro-creationism, anti-abortion, anti-polar bear, mavericky, idiotic, "MILF" has inspired a porn.

Not only that, but the title is the best part. Drum roll please....


LMAO. Seriously, the creator of that name needs to get a MAJOR raise because its simply brilliant. I'm actually really really impressed.

Hustler Porn is getting some serious increase in numbers after this one...

For the full article, via one of my fav websites,, please click here.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Count Your Blessings...

As I'm sitting on the couch, a preview for an TLC documentary called "Half Man, Half Tree" comes on.

No shit. I couldn't believe it. But there is, in fact, a man who has a rare condition of fucking TREE ROOTS sprouting from his body!

Mildly intrigued doesn't even cover 15% of my reaction to the preview. A man that turned into a tree???? When you think you've seen it all, some craziness like this pops up.

This makes "people" from movies like "I Am Legend" scarily realistic. Damn.

So when my mom comes home, I tell her about this madness and she has the nerve to say "I wonder if creatures live in there. Like larva." Only my mom :-/ WTF!? I didn't even consider the possibility of maggots and shit growing in between his tree branch-like fingers.


Think about the torment/pain/ridicule this man must go through everyday. Count your blessings, folks. Its not a game.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008


So the unfortunate surgery was not unfortunately painful! I'm so fucking happy, you have no idea.

My cousin had an ingrown toenail back when I was 7 and I went with her to the surgeon to get it fixed. I remember nothing about that day except for the ear-throbbing scream that my cousin made after the anesthesia injection. Its odd how I remember it so vividly sooo I was def freaking out all of yesterday/this morning while I was awaiting the pain...

But lo and behold, it really wasn't that bad!! Yayyyyy! I'm fixed :) but I'm also bed stricken so there shall be many blog posts to come since I will be bobbing around the house all day.

PS - If you're from the NYC area and you have been struck with feet issues, holla at Dr. Harvey Strauss in the heights. He's the bomb.

Monday, October 13, 2008

So yea. Long time no see.

12 whole days. Damn homie.

A lot has been going on. Work has started and is amazing, I made new friends and a new best friend who I LOVE. I love love and I love loving people so when amazing people come into my life, it makes me really happy.

Due to many hectic back-to-back events, I was completely awake from up from 2pm on Saturday until 3am this morning. Delirious doesn't even begin to describe the hot mess I was once the 24 hour mark hit. It was an experience nonetheless.

In other news...I'm diabetic. Lol. Soooo as a diabetic, my immune system is fairly shot and it takes me a while to heal once I get cuts or bruised or anything. Diabetics are known for having to get appendages removed like toes and fingers and shit. At diabetes camp, actually, we were required to wear socks everywhere in order to prevent stubbing toes. I don't know what happen, but I had this excruciating pain in my toe and it developed into this massively unattractive nastiness. I just came back to the doctor annnnd I' having surgery. FML! (FML = Fuck My Life)

So not only am I having surgery, but its early tomorrow morning, I'll be there by myself, leaving by myself via subway and I can't go to work for the rest of the week. FML again.

Speaking of FML, peep the funny/fucked up picture my new bestie sent me:

Damn. That hurts.

So the whole point of this blog was to reinvent. That's why I took a semester in the first place to get my shit together. I kinda sorta started started going to the gym and I realized I'm not as out of shape as I thought so yay. But I still have a lot of things to work on. This toe thing kinda got me shook and my mom is really scared for my health.

I think God is giving me a drop kick in the face and I need to shape up. I'm too young with too much going for me to have missing toes and shit.


In Politics News (you know I can't resist) - My mom received this e-mail from a friend about how corrupt the McCain campaign continues to be. Please read:

"The story is all over Progressive Talk Radio today about the MCain campaign
sending absentee ballot applications to registered democrats or people that have
donated to Obama's campaign. These ballots are deliberately misleading and
have postage paid return addresses that are for an election clerk that is
outside of your city or town. What this will end up doing is either having
your vote not counted, or if you return one of these, they will cite you for
election fraud, saying that you already voted absentee.These ballots are only
being sent out in "purple states" and this is a big deal.. This is
called voter caging, and is a huge problem.

The McCain campaign is stealing this election as we speak. Please get this
information out to as many people as you can ,and tell anyone you know who has
received one of these ballots that they need to contact their city election
clerk or the supervisor of elections immediately. Also call the local media
and let them know what is going on.

The main stream media is never going to cover this so we have to depend on our
ground campaign to get the word out to our voters."

This world is going crazy. I'm scared for my children. I'm scared that this world might collapse during my lifetime. 2012? Yea. Times are crazy.

And here are a few words from The Mavericky Tina Fey about our lovely Sarah Palin:

"If she wins, I'm done. And by I'm done, I mean I'm leaving the earth." - Tina Fey

LMAO. Tell us how you really feel :)

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

People Fucking Make Me Sick

Pardon my French but ...what the fuck is our world coming to? Seriously.

The day that a fucking grown ass man with two children has the fucking nerve to beat up, jump KNOCK OUT A 16 YEAR OLD GIRL because she got mad when he cut the line AT MCDONALDS is sooooo fucking absurd I can't even stand it.

Its repulsive, its pathetic, its shameful. PEOPLE LIKE THIS IS WHY BLACK PEOPLE GET SUCH A BAD NAME.

Are you serious? I almost vomited when I saw this video. No lie. I get back from work and my mom looks furious. I ask her whats wrong and she shows me this shit.

She had every right to be pissed off.

What the fuck? I can't even think straight. This video is not funny at all. With our environment slowly deteriorating, our economy falling a part, and a HUGE election coming up that will decide the future of our country, we do not need this bullshit. As cliche as this may sound, we need to stick together as a people because all we have is each other. Our world is collapsing before our eyes and we are still fighting, killing, and fucking each other over.

I'm on the verge of giving up.

Notice that NO ONE even blinks an eye! People fucking move out of the way, keep ordering, and act like nothing happened.


Damn. I thought New Yorkers were mean and rude, but LA takes the cake. I didn't know California got down like this.